A Whole New Space
by MangoGrape
Summary: A random joke fic I wrote when I was bored. Wheatley and Spacey find a magic carpet.


"Eight-million twenty two, eight-million twenty three, eight-million twenty...eight-million twenty... Augh! I've lost count again!" Wheatley grunted. For what may have been the billionth time, he'd attempted to count the many stars surrounding him, only to have lost track again. "Well, better start again I suppose. One, two, three-".

"Spaaaaaaaaaace!". A high pitch squeal erupted behind the core. Space Core. Wheatley didn't bother responding, knowing his friend was only going to continue with his rambling.

"Three, four, five-".

"SPACE BUDDY! SPACE BUDDY, LOOK!" Space Core cried. Wheatley rolled his optic.

"Yes, I see it Spacey, we're in space. I know. It's all around us, not gonna change anytime soon." Wheatley said.

"No, not space! Space carpet! In _space_!" the core shrieked excitedly. A carpet? In space? Wheatley forced himself to turn around, taking in the sight of the piece of fabric. He wasn't kidding, it was an Aperture brand carpet. Did the Aperture facility even make those? Apparently so.

"How did you even find that, mate?" Wheatley asked. Space Core moved his handles in a motion that could have been considered a shrug. Space Core inched down towards the carpet, seating himself on its fuzzy surface.

"Magic space carpet!" He gasped. Wheatley shook his optic.

"No, no, I'm sure it's just a regular old carpet. Aperture makes _science_, not magic." The intelligence sphere explained. Space Core wiggled in his place, motioning for Wheatley to sit. The blue core sighed, realizing he had nothing better to do anyway.

"Alright, alright, if you insist. But I really don't see what could possibly be so good about a- AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!". Wheatley found that as soon as he took his place next to the Space Core the carpet was propelled forward. They zipped through the confounds of space at what seemed to be light speed, zooming up and down and zig-zagging in all directions.

Soon enough, the orange carpet slowed down a considerable amount, though it was still traveling at a ridiculously fast speed. Wheatley pondered how the two of them could possibly have remained on the thing.

"What the- Space, how are you...? Is it even you? What's going on?" Wheatley asked. Suddenly, beautiful and somewhat calming music commenced around him. He raised his lower shutter in confusion.

"Where is that... coming from?" he asked.

"I can show you the spaaaaaace...". What was that? "Shining, shimmering, staaaaaars!". Was that actually Space Core?

"Are you singing? Where is that music even coming from?" Wheatley asked.

"Tell me, Wheatley, now when did you last let your heart decide?" Spacey sang.

"Uh, well, I don't have one, really. But if I did have one-" Wheatley started.

"I can open your eyeeeeee!" The little core sang, seemingly not noticing his friend had even replied to him. Funnily enough, Wheatley swore he'd never heard his partner say a complete sentence before. Although he had to admit, his singing wasn't too terrible.

"Take you wonder by wonder...

Over, sideways and under...

On a science carpet ride!

A whole new spaaaaaaace!

A new fantastic plane of being!

No one to tell us no, or where to go!

Or say we're malfunctioning!"

Space Core's sense of song and lyric was quite comical, actually. Very entertaining. Wheatley figured as long as he was there, he may as well just join in.

"A whole new spaaaaaace!" The blue core chimed in. Admittedly, his voice was a lot worse than Space Core's, but why were they to care?

"A dazzling place I never knew!

But when I'm way up here, it's crystal clear!

That now I'm banished to deep space with youuuuu!"

"Now I'm in a whole new space with youuuuu!"

"Unbelievable sights!

Indescribable feeling!

Debris, constellations, worm holes!

Through an endless starry sky!

A whole new spaaaaace!"

Suddenly, the carpet drew downward. At a very sharp angle, actually. Wheatley squeezed his shutters closed for the fear they would fly off at any second.

"Don't close your optic lens." Space Core commanded.

"A hundred thousand planets to see!" Wheatley squealed.

"Hold your breath; it gets better!" The yellow core promised.

"I'm like a shooting star!

I'm lost so far!

I can't go back!

To the Aperture facilityyyyyy!"

"A whole new space!

Every turn is the same!

With new galaxies to pursue!

Every moment red-letter!"

The two little cores combined their voices, creating an odd sounding harmony of song.

"I'll chase them anywhere!

There's time to spare!

Let me share this whole new space with you!"

"A whole new spaaaaace..." .

"A whole new spaaaaace...".

"That's where we'll beeee...".

"That's where we'll beeee...".

"A thrilling chaaaaase...".

"A wondrous plaaaaaace...".

"For you aaaand... meeeeeeee~" The two cores finished. And when the last note of their song had played, the carpet beneath them spontaneously combusted and vanished. A brief silence passed before Wheatley broke the silence.

"Well that was short lived."


End file.
